Identifying the Signs of Anxiety Caused by Childhood
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Identifying the Signs of Anxiety Caused by Childhood

Identifying the Signs of Anxiety Caused by Childhood

Did you realize when was the first time you had anxiety? It may be caused by various factors, but one of the most important determining factors could be how you were raised as a child. Sure, there can be numerous factors but below are few guidelines that can help you recognize that a part of your anxiety is caused because of the way you have been raised as a child. 

Being Self-Critical

Did your caregivers always criticize you? Did they always focus on your flaws rather than focusing on the strengths? Now the question is, so, is it wrong to point out the flaws so that you can rectify them? No, it is not wrong. But that needs to be done in a balanced way. If your parents only focused on the mistakes they made in their lives and focused overly on their mistakes to make you understand how you have to be perfect, else your life too can be misery or your caregivers are always telling you the mistakes you make as a sign to remind you of your mistakes so that you don’t repeat them, chances are we get entrapped in our own negative thought patterns as we grow up. The only way to break the chain of thought patterns is to realize that your negative thoughts have to be replaced by positive ones. Believe in the fact that everything is not in your control, so criticizing yourself for everything is not the solution. It is "OK!" to make mistakes. Learn from them instead of judging yourself constantly. Every situation will offer you with the positive side and a negative one. Focusing on the positive side to rectify the mistake is the key. Learn to forgive yourself because self-criticism can increase social anxiety disorder.

Having Low Self-esteem

If you always have been compared with other people, siblings, and friends, you will automatically grow up with low self-esteem. Low self-esteem ruins your self-faith. So does that mean you will not compare yourself with others? The answer is yes, you should always learn from people who are better than you and healthy comparison is good but the key is to maintain balance.

Fear of Abandonment and Being Judged

While growing up, if you have placed too much importance on someone and have put someone on a very high pedestal and received abandonment from them, then you will grow up as a person who has fear of abandonment. If you have caregivers who are constantly judging other people and are rigid and do not wish to see the perspective of other people in general; growing up in such an environment will always pressurise you to think what others think about you. This may lead to Anxiety.

Fear of Having Relationships

Having parents or caregivers who have neglected each other may lead to a fear in your mind that your partner will end up doing the same with you. You get lost as to how to solve such issues at an emotional level and it causes emotional turmoil. As you grow up with these emotional confusions, you tend to follow either of the below-mentioned relationship styles; 

A. “Anxious attachment pattern” style of relationship 

B. “Avoidant attachment pattern” style of relationship

Do you relate to any of these? 

If you do, then it’s time that you heal yourself. Try to get out of the negative thinking pattern that has been embedded in your mind during all these years. The easiest way to substitute these negative thinking patterns with positive ones is that you accept, that certain things do not work out and it’s ok to come out of certain conditioning that isn’t working anymore and to realize that you need to break free of these repetitive negative thinking patterns. Start with the smallest step. Have faith that everything will work out the way it is supposed to be. Calm your mind, surrender to the Zen point and divine energy will start working in your favor.

About the Author:

Debangana Basu (ORCID: 0000-0001-7181-2506) is a Kolkata-based human resource consultant. 

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DISCLAIMER: The views expressed in this insight piece are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the IndraStra Global.